A confession

I've been putting off writing this post for a while. I haven't been able to stitch on The Astronomer for ages now. Nearly 3 months. I cant bring myself to pick it up.

I have recently been diagnosed with OCD. I am trying different medications but will not be trying CBT therapy as it is not something that has worked well for me in the past.

Stitching became such a mammoth task due to rituals and compulsions i had to follow before i could even sit down to stitch. Constant checking of symbols and placement of stitches became overwhelming. The smallest mistake would end in tears. I started washing my hands till they bled in case dirt or oil got on to my work.

Im done for a while. I WILL stitch in the future but for now i need to get my meds mix right and concentrate on getting better. I want stitching to be relaxing again and fun. not how it has been for the last few months.


So for now have some pics!

Esmai recently broke her nose while riding her bike. She went straight into a lamppost. The very next day she was back on her bike. Shes fearless! The lamppost was replaced a week later as she had dented it. She will be 4 next month!

Connor is doing amazing! He can now ride his bike without stabilizers and is learning to ride one handed. He is still enjoying being Home Educated. He is doing very well at beavers and has earnt a lot of badges. He recently had his first sleep over with the beavers and enjoyed every second.  Connor has just turned 8!!

I have lost a tonne of weight- well not a tonne. 8 stone since last January. All thanks to a stomach ulcer. Im enjoying the slimmer version of me. I still Hate clothes shopping with a passion though! 

Pathetic, Pitiful but progress....

2 Months since my last update. I had hoped to get so much more done.

For Xmas i got a new floor stand with a rolling frame, i was so excited about this but haven't been able to get on with it. The frame is not keeping my tension tight enough so i have gone back to using my hoop. I think this is part of the reason i have stitched as much as i had hoped. That and i have restarted my driving lessons and am studying for my theory. 

So this is how far i have got. I am loving the colors and slowly working which parts i can make out. Its nice to have a bit more color in this page. I am  really looking forward to doing more of the telescope, but it looks like confetti hell!

Missing In Action

My stitchy bug has gone AWOL if you find it could you please return it

A new start

Unfortunately not a stitching start.... I got a new job, evening work, 5 nights a week cleaning in a office. I start tonight. Its easily been 6 years since i last worked and im so excited its unbelievable! I have no idea how this will affect my stitching as i wont be finishing till 10-11pm

Progress has been so slow! I am really struggling to keep up the motivation to finish this page. I think once i have finished this one i will start to enjoy the stitching more, it just seem to keep dragging on and feel like i have achieved nothing. I think the next pages will stitch up quickly. I might even be able to finish in time for Xmas this year, if im lucky!!

Stitchey update

 

We have been busy busy busy!

Stitching has been going well but slow due to not pressuring myself and also we have hit a very busy 2 weeks in Home schooling.

 

We have been working on the Solar system. I had grand plans to paper mache the solar system. I worked on it solidly every night for almost 2 weeks. Each planet got several coats and when they were finally ready to paint, I called Connor into the kitchen only to find that they had all collapsed. Every sodding one! So we ended up buying polestrine balls from the local craft shop. We had lots of fun making the model and although it still needs some tweaking i am happy to have it done. We are currently working on a floor book of the Solar system. Its like a lapbook but massive. Hopefully it should be finished within a few days,if i find my get up and go, which im afraid has got up and gone. Possibly as we are all full of flu.

 

Please excuse the poor quality photos my camera isnt feeling too well either.

 

Stitching as of last night

Some written work Connor has done on the Solar system

Painting Mars

All painted and drying

Hanging in Connors bedroom

 Esmai has now learnt to use a fork without stabbing herself!

A little break

I have no stitching at all to show. Surprisingly im not that bothered by it.

I spent most of last year trying to finish page after page, I kind of lost the love for stitching.

I thought it was just where I had worked on the same project for so long and told myself that when I started something new I would plough straight in and everything would be perfect.

I found I was also comparing myself to other stitchers, how fast i finished a page, how neat my stitches was....

It was just another stress -when my life had became very stressful- that I had to manage and eventaully became not enjoyable. To be honest everything got ontop of me a little.

A break was very much needed. I told myself i would finish the page by Xmas then have a little break and would start a new project in the New Year.

I was hoping to get the threads for one of my Birthday charts but the car went BANG! so I am still waiting for them.

I decieded that a bit of a extended break was needed.

It has been almost a month since i put needle to fabric. I havent looked at any of the stitching on any Facebook groups im on unless it popped up on my newsfeed. I havent read any blogs. I havent even looked at my stitching!

Damn i have been bored!

I think its time for the break to be over. I have found that i dont know what to do with my hands at night while watching TV.

I have started to look forward to sitting down and feeling the thread between my fingers and seeing the progress i have made.

TONIGHT I WILL STITCH !!!



Slowly, and possibly not every night. I dont know when my next update will be. Im going to concentrate on enjoying every stitch, like it should be, not on how much i have accomplished.